09/04/24 – Time Enough

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Working on a computer, Zack said, "I can set up a link with some large transmitters from earth and probably 'blast' a message through a bunch of satellites to amplify it and send it away from earth rather than back towards it." Picknar said, "it should include the tune 'rock-a-bye-baby,' as that's unfortunately identical to the galactic S.O.S. signal. And we'll need a meeting point." Rodrigo said, "Melody Park is nearby." Opening a bottle of wine, Jo said, "that's it. This is all too much without a drink." Zack asked to the room, "what phone number should I give them?" Looking at Val's smartphone, Picknar said, "it looks like mine is 505-555-0143." Rodrigo said, "look at you understanding quaint little ol' earth technology." He then looked over at Jo, who was drinking directly from the wine bottle, and said, "and Jo has the right idea, I'm making another drink, anyone want one?" Watching Zack, Knox said, "how long will it take?" Smiling, Rodrigo said, "it'll be very quick, unless we're out of ice." Annoyed, Knox said, "I mean, 'how long before the message goes out, and how long until a reply?'" Rodrigo said, "surely long enough for me to make drinks. Or hopefully at least long enough for me to make myself one."

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I like the whole Hollywood thing of using “555” numbers. Everyone knows it’s fake, but we’ve all communally accepted that we’ll pretend it’s real.

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Working on a computer, Zack said, “I can set up a link with some large transmitters from earth and probably ‘blast’ a message through a bunch of satellites to amplify it and send it away from earth rather than back towards it.” Picknar said, “it should include the tune ‘rock-a-bye-baby,’ as that’s unfortunately identical to the galactic S.O.S. signal. And we’ll need a meeting point.” Rodrigo said, “Melody Park is nearby.” Opening a bottle of wine, Jo said, “that’s it. This is all too much without a drink.” Zack asked to the room, “what phone number should I give them?” Looking at Val’s smartphone, Picknar said, “it looks like mine is 505-555-0143.” Rodrigo said, “look at you understanding quaint little ol’ earth technology.” He then looked over at Jo, who was drinking directly from the wine bottle, and said, “and Jo has the right idea, I’m making another drink, anyone want one?” Watching Zack, Knox said, “how long will it take?” Smiling, Rodrigo said, “it’ll be very quick, unless we’re out of ice.” Annoyed, Knox said, “I mean, ‘how long before the message goes out, and how long until a reply?'” Rodrigo said, “surely long enough for me to make drinks. Or hopefully at least long enough for me to make myself one.”
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23 Comments

    1. KQY

      As long as one had a computerized switch. I had an old electromechanical one in Pine Plains, NY for 518-398-xxxx and we couldn’t use the 555 directory assistance since our ancient switch couldn’t handle the three exchange digits being all the same. Not until the late 1980s when they finally built a new exchange switching office.

    1. someone

      Nah, the longer Knox is grumpy about everyone going along with the nutjobs, the better. I enjoy his disapproval. Seeing actual aliens would force him to stop thinking everyone else is crazy.

      1. RUSSELL

        Note that unless someone chips them, they won’t be able to understand Ruddock. The translation technology ends up working just like the babble fish. You speak your native language, everybody hears it as their native language.

        The chip is part of the body, so although they may or may not understand their native language, I doubt if anyone that comes will know it.

  1. Coyoty

    I forget whether the GOB is mining a moon of Jupiter or Saturn. The signal should take about 45 minutes to reach Jupiter and 83 minutes to reach Saturn. A ship would arrive at Earth about 5 minutes later at dark speed.

  2. KQY

    He could just use my EME station. Earth-Moon-Earth. AKA Moonbounce. It’s an amateur radio thing. Plenty of them around the Earth. Any one of those would put more signal outbound than trying to use satellite transponders. Most of those are aimed back at Earth so all that’d make it outbound is what misses the planet.

  3. Pete Rogan

    Some fifty years ago, Charles Schulz drew a Sunday “Peanuts” that had Charlie Brown chasing a homer most of the panels, and when he found the ball, he used a pay phone to call to ask they call him when his turn at bat came. And gave an actual California number. It was bad enough for the Petaluma resident plagued that week with calls asking if Charlie Brown were there, but people in different area codes with the same final seven digits got those calls as well, until the FCC took notice. The NCS never said a word about it, but after that cartoonists in general were careful what phone numbers they inked in. Out of that came the ‘555’ convention now in universal use. But once it was not. Another obscure chunk of cartooning history for your collection; I got a million of ’em!

    1. KQY

      And the rules for telephone numbers which were in force then, are all gone now. Such as the center digit for the area code must be a 0 or a 1, or you can’t have all three digits for an exchange (the three digits following the area code) all be the same. Those were once forced by electromechanical switching offices. Now, anything goes as it’s all computerized. And all dialing is now ten digits and the area code means diddly/squat.

  4. Since the two ends of the phone call are not going to be in the same country, they are going to have the international country codes. ( I think Canada and USA were originally the same country as far as the switching network was concerned, since they were the only countries on the network that allowed customer dialing as opposed to the use of operators.

    Also, many years ago, there was a program for calling Santa Claus, and you were connected to a human being. Unfortunately, they put the wrong telephone number in the newspaper advertisement, and it happened to be a very sensitive unlisted number at NORAD, only to be used in an emergency, probably involving the start of World War III. So the general is sitting at his desk and the big red phone rings. He immediately picked it up and was astonished to hear the person at the other end ask to talk to Santa Claus. He probably thought it was just a wrong number, but after a number of calls, he knew something crazy was happening. There are a few versions of the story, but the one I liked was that the general called over a low ranking officer or a sergeant to handle the calls. So he started to tell the people dialing in that he was at NORAD and he was making sure that Santa Claus didn’t run problems during his trips. And so started the story of NORAD tracking Santa Claus so that they could insure his safety.

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